Client Highlight: Ryan J.
Can you describe the moment when you realized you wanted to start your journey of recovery?
“The realization came when I was completely homeless. I lost everything and I didn't want to live anymore. I was desperate. I had tried to get sober before, and it didn't work. There were multiple times I was just at the end of it. I didn't have anywhere to go and nowhere to turn. I knew I had to do something before I died.”
What have been some of the most significant challenges you’ve encountered and how have you handled them along the way?
“I would say one of the biggest challenges I've had to face is having people that I know who struggle with their own mental health and addiction issues continuing to die. Some of those people were really close to me. That's always been a challenge, and then it's the mental stuff. Sometimes I was struggling with not feeling worthy. Some days, you know, I didn’t feel capable. Those are big challenges, but I just tried not to focus on the negative thoughts and focus on the action of doing it, and working on it every day. It wasn’t easy at first. It felt a little bit easier some days. It's not easy at all, but I think I've gained a lot of ground.”
Have you discovered new activities or practices that have positively impacted your recovery?
“Absolutely! I’ve had all kinds of activities and hobbies that I do that have helped. I go to the gym everyday. Every. Day. I don't miss a day. There's always something that can be done there. I run. I’ve competed in half marathons, which is something I've always dreamed about doing. I do stuff alone. I get to be a mentor to people. I get to do community service and work with great people in the community and continue to be involved and evolve in those areas. I get to spend more time with my family because they actually want me around now. I get to spend a lot of time with people from the Driftless house and now I have the opportunity to employ some of those people, so I get to spend more time with them as they work for me. Those things are huge to my recovery. I got to start my own business again and it's completely mine. That's one of the things that I wanted to do for a long time that my addiction stopped me from. Not only am I an employee, but I'm a business owner. There's a lot of stuff I could go on and on that have impacted my recovery in a positive way.”
What Driftless Recovery services have you/do you participate in? What have you found helpful?
“I see a counselor at Driftless Recovery. I've done all the outpatient programs at Driftless Recovery. I lived at the Driftless House, which is where I got my feet back on the ground and was able to thrive again. This place was monumental to my recovery. It was actually the biggest, this place, so I utilized all the resources provided.”
What are some milestones or achievements you feel proud of?
“I'm approaching 2 years of sobriety. Since I was probably 12 years old I've never accomplished that so that's one of the biggest things getting sober did for me. Within 4 months of getting sober and living at the Driftless House and continuing to work, doing programs, and going to meetings every day I was able to start my own business. It is completely, solely my own business. While living at the Driftless House, after six or seven months, I was able to go to the dealership after getting my credit repaired. I was able to get a loan on a 2016 Audi, something I thought I would never be able to do, which I was never able to do before. Running half marathons when just over 2 years ago I was learning how to walk again because I had died and came back and I had a lot of physical and medical and mental issues from that, so to be able to run to even walk to be able to run half marathons. I think those are all huge things.”
What have you learned about yourself during your time in services?
”I've learned a lot about myself. I went from being an impulsive person to being conscious of my thoughts and actions, which was a really big thing that I've learned along the way. I've learned not to act based on what I think before I use what I’ve learned because I’ve learned that my feelings will change if I just allow myself to sit in them. One will be replaced with another one. Maybe it'll be worse, maybe it'll be better, but it will always change. So if I just don't get consumed by that feeling there's just so many things I can do. I got a sponsor, started going to meetings here and listening to other people's struggles. I've also learned that if I really dedicate myself to something, no matter what it is, I always come out victorious. As long as I push myself to the end, I will always become a winner if I allow myself not to stop. I used to say I can't do it until I realized that I can do so much more than I thought I was ever capable of. In the process I'm learning that I am only human and that I do make mistakes and that I can live with those mistakes in the past. It was hard to ever even acknowledge my mistake and the things that I've done wrong. But I’ve made significant changes in my personal life and I'm growing. Everyday it's something new, you know.”
What plans/goals do you have for yourself moving forward?
”My plan for the future is to continue to grow my business and employee people in recovery. That's one of the main reasons why I started my business, was to help people in recovery, so it's getting used to that. I want to continue to help people, and also get involved in real estate. I’d like to be able to buy and sell properties so that I can eventually start to provide for people that are trying to do better in this world and that are thriving in their recovery. I want to give them opportunities like housing where they might not have before due to evictions and stuff like that, or not having a rental history. Those are some of the things that I want to do. Running a marathon again. I also want to become more of a gentler, kinder, loving soul and a more understanding person so that way I can continue to hopefully help people in my recovery that are in recovery and everyone else in this world.”
Final message to the readers:
“Let's see the final message: No matter what you're going through it will get better. It may not get better right away, but it will get better if you don't hide from the things that you are afraid of and you face them and you go through them. You will come out stronger on the other side and you will prove to yourself that you are capable of something far more than you think. If you try to be open and honest and express your feelings and your thoughts to people that genuinely care about you and are in your better interest, you will learn that you can start thriving and growing and growing and thriving. In this world, now being sober, I'm very grateful that I have the opportunity to do that every day and if I sit back and take the time to think about my days at the end of the day, I do see growth. Some of it's little and some of its massive, some of these things that I gain are more than I could ever imagine, so just keep pushing.”
